Putting the “Aaah!” in Adulthood
Welcome to my blog, about my life at the moment. My Aaah!dulthood. “Why the ‘Aaah!’,” you ask?
Well, I’ll admit, when the name first came to me, it was with Macaulay Culkin’s classic Home Alone face. I felt like little Kevin when he woke up with no parents and had to learn to fend for himself. Sure, I was a couple decades older, and it didn’t quite happen overnight. But it still felt a little overwhelming.
See, the bulk of my 20s revolved around work. I wasn’t a workaholic trying to establish myself or climb a career ladder. I was just someone who loved my job and let life follow its lead. I traveled extensively and home was employee housing. I will say, housework wasn’t a big priority in those places. Neither was cooking. I made money, but didn’t think much about what to do with it. My hobbies were doing more of my job. My friends were people who did the same thing and lived the same lifestyle.
Until I happened to take a little step outside of that world…
Then, “suddenly” at 30ish, I found myself cohabiting with a partner. And his two kids. We even got a cat. Oh, and then a house of our very own. With all that, plus realizing some things — like my money and my dentist — can’t be ignored forever, I started to feel the frightened “Aaah!” coming in. I wondered if there was a manual I had missed out on, one that would tell me how to be a proper grown-up.
But it wasn’t all terrible. I found out I like doing a lot of that stuff, like managing my personal finances and cooking. (Still not so keen on the dentist and cleaning, but c’est la vie.) I found new hobbies. Like making jam.
Each time I accomplish something that makes me feel like I’m getting the hang of this responsibility stuff, I can high five the Mandult, or maybe just let out a little sigh of relief — “aaah.”
But that’s not the only transformation I’ve been going through the last few years. I’ve let out my inner hippie too. So yeah, I stopped washing my hair. But much deeper stuff too. Developing my spirituality, and diving way into my personal growth. I’ve had the moments of joy that make me reach my arms into the air and say “Aaah!’
That is the direction I want to keep heading. Who knows, maybe one day I will even transcend the need to care about all those responsibilities. Or at least manifest enough abundance to hire a maid! But until then, I’m just going to keep figuring this out as I go along. All of it. The little things that come with every day life, and the big things I know are inside of me.
What puts the “Aaah” in your adulthood? What parts of this life are most scary, and what are most rewarding to you?